


Deep Rooted Desire

by SinfulAqua, Sinfulpapillon



Category: Kingdom Hearts
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Character Death, F/M, Hanahaki Disease, Implied Childhood Sexual Abuse, Implied/Referenced Abuse, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Implied/Referenced Torture, Mild Gore, Mild Sexual Content, Past Sexual Abuse, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Temporary Character Death
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-07-28
Updated: 2019-03-06
Packaged: 2019-06-17 11:45:58
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 5
Words: 15,809
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15460677
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SinfulAqua/pseuds/SinfulAqua, https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sinfulpapillon/pseuds/Sinfulpapillon
Summary: He didn't think he was capable of love. The flower petals he was coughing up said otherwise, though. The last thing he wanted to be was vulnerable and yet she had managed to sneak into the cracks of his broken half of a heart and plant her roots there. Those very roots were finding their way up his throat with a stubborn insistence to remind him of his own weaknesses. He knew there was no saving him. She herself was coughing up petals, but they weren't for him. They were, of course, for the half of him she would naturally find more appealing.The half of him made of light.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> No one should let us write angst or should have let us anywhere NEAR this AU. Also, yes, we have fallen into Kingdom Hearts hell and fallen for the Vanaqua ship.

_No, no, no, no, no! Not now, any time but now!_

Pink petals stuck to her lips as she tried to duck around a corner to avoid the Unversed, her hand covering her mouth to muffle her pained coughs. She didn't have the time to cast Cure and Esuna, she didn't even realize she was running out of time before her next attack. Yellow petals were slipping past her fingers, her coughs becoming more and more violent. Her keyblade clattered to the ground as she moved her other hand to her mouth.

This was it, wasn't it? This was how she was going to die.

A few anxious-looking Unversed skittered along in search of her, not quite hitting their mark as they passed by and moved down to the next building. Aqua took a chance and peered around the corner after the Unversed passed, trying to steady her breathing and ignore how constricting it felt. She could cast her spells now and feel at ease for another few hours, but she also didn't know if that would be when an Unversed would strike her in the back and interrupt it. She was just going to have to keep running then.

That is, until cold metal was pressed against her back. A certain boy whose face remained concealed by its mask stood behind her, keyblade in hand.

"Nuh uh uh. Where do you think _you're_ going, huh?"

" _You_." She still managed to have some venom in her words, even as her body shuddered with yet another oncoming attack. She couldn't let him find out about this though, she wouldn't! Aqua made sure to wipe at any petals that had stuck to her before turning to face him, anger in her eyes. "You want to lose to me again?" She held her hand out, her keyblade materializing in moments.

"Last I checked, I haven't died by your hand. I haven't been beaten until I've died. No, I've been _testing_ you. Like I said, you seem like a good backup and I'd rather keep making sure of that in case our initial plan falls through." He tilted his head, looking her over. "On that note, you're not getting sick, are you? Hm? You can't be a proper backup if you're coughing your guts out."

"Sh-shut up!" She struck her keyblade against his, but the movement was far shakier than normal. If she cast _Cure_ and _Esuna_ now, she would be okay, but it would leave her open to be attacked by him. That left her at the risk of her spells being interrupted. _Dammit_ , if she just hadn't run into Ven here, then these blooms wouldn't be bothering her so soon! "I'm not sick. I'm not-" Oh. _Oh no._ Aqua quickly covered her mouth again, hoping to keep any petals hidden as she began to cough once more.

He watched her closely, seeing a stray petal fall through her fingers. "Ohhhh, someone has a _crush!_ Oh, that is just _gold_. Who is it, Aqua? Hm?"

She glared at him, willing the coughs to subside for just a moment. The second she felt like she could breathe again, she was quick with her spells.

" _Cure. Esuna._ "

As soon as her healing magic washed over her, she rushed him, slamming her keyblade against his chest. He, however, countered her hit effortlessly before chuckling. "Aren't you cute? I wonder just how many people are in this world that you know? I bet I could narrow it down pretty easily. From there, maybe I should make them suffer just so I can see that angry look on your face again. It _is_ pretty cute, after all."

With that, he then teleported behind her to strike.

Sure, Aqua’s face flushed a bit at his comment, but it just served to anger her, bringing that very look to her features. She growled, effectively irritating her throat but unable to bring herself to care. He didn't know how hard it was to conceal this disease, didn't know the lengths she had gone to and the amount of effort put into dealing with her symptoms for a little over four years. Aqua threw up a barrier to block his strike before moving to counter it, magic orbs flying up to strike him back.

"Oh ho ho! _Feisty!_ " He quickly teleported away again, doing so a couple of times to avoid being hit. "Well, it won't do you any good to lose your cool, will it? After all..." she didn't have to see behind the mask to know he was smirking. "...If Ventus loses his cool, I won't hesitate to take advantage of that and watch the life fade from his eyes as I do so. Wouldn't that be lovely for you?"

If she could see the smirk that she so clearly heard, she would just love to slap it off of his face. When he spoke of what he would do to Ven though...

No. She had to keep her cool, she couldn't let him know that the cause of her disease was the very boy who saw her as a big sister. How messed up could she get?!

"Stop making empty threats!" She shot a shard of ice towards him. "Ven would never lose his cool and allow that to happen!"

"Oh really? Have you really seen that boy when someone antagonizes him? I've said only a few things to him and he immediately got all fired up! And then he ran away from home! He's already been making some stupid mistakes because of losing his cool. His death could _easily_ be one of them." He not only dodged her attack, but also sunk into the ground itself.

Wait, he was the reason Ven ran away from home?! Hang on, he had mentioned something about a masked person, and then Terra had said a name.

 _Vanitas_.

So, this was Vanitas then? At least she now had a name to call this jerk.

"What did you say to him?!" She cartwheeled away from where she could see a moving shadow, snaking around like those Floods did.

He chuckled from beneath the ground, continuing to follow before popping back up above the ground and swiping at her.  "Wouldn't _you_ like to know?"

She just barely had the time to block, stumbling back from him. Had he always been this quick? Had he gone easier in their last fight? "We've been worried about him! He isn't fully trained, he shouldn't be out here yet! What. Did. You. Say?!"

She thrust her keyblade into the air, summoning a Magnet spell. Suddenly, he was pulled into the air, finding himself stuck in the spell's pull, twirling in a circle helplessly.

"That's such a cheap shot!"

Aqua couldn't help but giggle, deciding to not strike him with her keyblade just yet. That didn't stop her from jumping up and casting Thunder though, the ring of electricity extending from her to hit him. He stiffened as the electricity coursed through him, but he forced himself to have as much control as he was able to keep.

"What did you say to Ven? Because he won't come home now, and it's _your_ fault!"

"Is it really my fault? Or is it your master's for not letting him go anywhere outside of your world? _Anyone_ would get curious and feel suffocated after a while!"

"Master Eraqus has his reasons! And I had promised to take Ven to a new world if I ever became a master myself!" Petals nudged at the back of her throat again, but she forced herself to keep them down. She would not let this monster be the one who held her own heart over her head like this.

"Why? So you could get him away from home and try to convince him that you can be more than a mother figure to him? Or perhaps your intentions were more sinister? " Finally, he dropped back to the ground, getting back into his battle stance.

"Shut up! I want him to see other worlds, not... not any of that!" The flowers blooming in her chest and constricting her lungs said otherwise. Was she really going to have to cast her spells again so soon?

He had no right to assume what he was about her feelings for Ven! But he was right, he was more than right, why couldn't Ven see her differently?

"All I told him was that Terra was leaving and he wouldn't be the same the next time he saw him if he didn't follow. And, trust me, that's entirely true."

She grit her teeth when he spoke again, nearly charging him. No, she had to stay calm, stay focused. "Terra is stronger than any of you think. He won't be different!" A lie for herself more than anything else.

Vanitas erupted into laughter, his body shaking from the force of it. "Oh man, you crack me up! How much denial are you in? Have you really convinced yourself that everything you just said is true? You're so optimistic that you're delusional." He dropped his battle stance, simply shrugging. "Then again, it looks to me like light makes all of you delusional with hope. It's sad, really."

"Because everything is true! I'm not in denial, I'm just-"

She should have taken advantage of his battle stance dropping, should have rushed him again and finally ended him. But there was that tightness in her chest, that sickly feeling in her throat. Aqua dropped to one knee, keyblade pressing hard into the ground to keep her from falling over completely as a violent cough attack hit her. Petals fell around her, painting a morbidly beautiful image the moment full blooms begin to emerge.

Primroses, scabious blossoms, pink camellias, and gardenias soon joined the scattered petals, a few of the delicate flowers sporting flecks of blood.

Her blood.

" _Cure. Esuna!_ " She was quick to cast her spells before there were any more flowers. Yellow tulips, bluebells, and sunflowers remained locked by her lungs, close to her heart, no doubt. This was why her medicine was far better to have for this. But she had none, and now her enemy had seen her in such a weak state.

She moved to aim her keyblade ar him, rage clear on her face.

" _FIRA!_ "

He quickly dodged out of the way, chuckling a bit before he rushed over to her, tucking his keyblade beneath her chin. "You know, I was giving you a moment to do your thing and here you are trying to attack me despite that. That's okay, though...I can appreciate you fighting dirty."

He knelt down beside her, picking up a few of the various flowers on the ground, observing the speckled bits of blood on their surface.

"Beautiful..."

He took her chin in his hand, looking over her face quietly. "There's that lovely angry look again. But it is somehow sweeter like this... You know, pain can make you stronger, Aqua. Perhaps you should embrace it, shape it into more strength. You could definitely benefit from this."

Aqua shuddered when he grasped her chin, a wave of disgust and discomfort washing over her. "You. . . You _freak_. I don't gain anything from this, and neither would you!" She could still taste blood in her mouth, weighing heavy on her tongue. And there was a part of her, a deep, twisted part that wanted to show him what her anger could do, what her pain was capable of.

But the Master had taught her better. As far as she knew, her heart was void of any darkness, and she would rather keep it that way.

The boy was too enthralled in how she looked. Even as she was throwing insults, Vanitas found himself staring at those soft lips, still speckled with blood and looking oh-so-pink and enticing. His heart began to hammer in his chest, slowly moving his finger up toward her lips.

Why did he enjoy this image so much? Why did everything feel so _warm?_

She then suddenly smacked her head against his helmet, hoping to crack the glass and maybe disorient him so she could run.

Aqua successfully caught him off guard, his thoughts jolted back to the current situation as she suddenly slammed into his helmet, causing him to falter for a bit. Still, he wore a helmet for a reason, and his keyblade was trained on her once again as soon as he could gain his bearings back.

"What do you know about pain? Hm? Because all I see is someone crippled by it far too easily."

"I am not crippled, _Vanitas_." It was the first time she properly used his name, the sound of it echoing within her ears. A creature like this didn't deserve a name, and yet he had one. Besides, how could he make the claim that she was crippled by this? She was dealing with it, she was trying! It wasn't her fault that none of the worlds she had been to so far contained the materials for her medicine, and the ones she tried to use didn't synthesize correctly either!

Aqua pushed herself up, knocking his keyblade aside with her own before returning to her battle stance. Magic flooded through her, her Spellweaver style itching beneath her skin to be used. "You know nothing about any of us."

"Oh, I know a lot more than you think." Vanitas chuckled, letting his helmet fade away so it could have time to repair itself.  

She was a bit thrown off when he removed his helmet to reveal that he actually had a face. Why did it surprise her so much that he had one? Perhaps it was because he seemed human in form but acted so monstrous.

With a smirk, he watched her with golden eyes, getting back into his battle stance excitedly. "You don't know the power pain can give you, but I could show you. Would you like a tutorial?"

"You won't sway me. Whatever you're planning won't work!"

Light erupted from her, encasing her in a purple glow as her Spellweaver style took effect. Her keyblade separated from her hand as she launched it towards him.

He dropped back into the ground once more, trying to avoid the worst of her blows. He had to come up, of course, so he'd jump out of the ground every once in a while to try and hit her again. He managed to get a few hits in, but the pain from his weapon was more welcome when compared to the pain caused by her disease. In fact, if she actually stopped to think, it would be obvious that she was letting this pain fuel her.

Still, eventually, he came out at the wrong time, taking a pretty bad hit before falling to the ground. The hit that sent him back was a bolt of pure light from her keyblade, fired as if it was any of her other projectile spells.

Once he’d fallen, Aqua stalked over to him, kicking his keyblade aside before getting on top of him so he would stay pinned down, Rainfell raised above them both with her magic. The Master would tell her to not use light like this, but he wasn't here right now. She just... had to ignore that he had a face... that he looked so completely _human_. She _had_ to ignore it!

The problem with trying to ignore it, of course, was that he didn't just have _any_ kind of face. He had a face that looked the same age as Ventus's, with similarities that were almost eerie in comparison. Large eyes stared up at her with barely suppressed shock, an underlying tone of fear within them. Her keyblade wavered above them as she stared down into unnaturally gold irises, surprised by just how _human_ they still looked despite everything.

She... She couldn't do this. _She couldn't do this!_

The glow of magic faded from around her, Rainfell falling and stabbing into the ground by his head.

"Why?! Why are you tormenting us?!" This... this wasn't a monster, this was a _boy_ , one she had just tried to _kill_. The Master would be ashamed of her, say that she was unfit to be a Master in her own right.

Vanitas stared up at her for a moment before breaking out into manic laughter once again. " _Torment?_ You think _this_ is torment?" He continued laughing, the age of his voice suddenly a lot more obvious now that his helmet was off. "I'm just trying to end my _own_ torment but none of you are _ready_ yet! I'm having to wait until you _idiots_ get in the proper place already so we can end all of this!" His laughter subsided for the briefest of moments, as if he was thinking something over, before he suddenly erupted into even more of it. "Why'd you stop, Aqua? You could do us both a favor and finish me off right here and now. Go on. _Do it._ "

Aqua knew she couldn't do it. She couldn't, she just _couldn't!_ Even though she moved to grab her keyblade and position it above his chest, even though she tried to will herself to thrust the blade down into him, she couldn't do it. Aqua let out a frustrated cry, tossing her keyblade aside. It faded into light to await the next time she would need it.

"To finish you off would mean you win. But I won't do that. I won't give into darkness. I won't be a murderer!"

Vanitas blinked again before shaking his head. "You say that but what are you doing to the Unversed? What? Do they not count?" He allowed himself to calm down a little under her, sighing in an almost disappointed manner as he closed his eyes. So close. He had come so close. "Just go to the next step and kill me next. They're mine, after all. They come from _me._ "

"They. . . They _what?!_ " She scrambled to get off of him, her gaze darting about for those very creatures she had fought here and in other worlds. Slowly, she looked back at Vanitas, noting the disappointment on his face.

He. . . He really wanted to die, didn't he? What kind of person just wanted that so casually?!

"I'm not a monster like you are. Ask all you want, you won't get anything from me!" She exclaimed, still determined to not give in.

There was a look on his face that almost resembled a disappointed pout, a look of slight desperation in his eyes as he temporarily looked like a hopeless lost little boy... not much unlike how _another_ boy she knew could look at times. For a split second, she didn't see gold eyes and black hair. For a split second, she saw blue eyes full of hurt and blond hair that had she had just run her fingers through in an attempt to comfort.

Another wave of pain struck her, and she could only roll to her side as flowers sprung from her chest and spilled from her mouth. It was like the first day she had discovered the petals that had begun to fester near her lungs. Ven had lost to Terra during practice again, and as she comforted him, there had been a wave of nausea followed by petals drifting into Ven's hair.

He had thought it was magic.

Aqua knew she was dying, even before the later stages could begin.

"S-stop!" She could taste copper on her tongue. There was more blood on the flowers. She was going to have to increase her spells, or manage to synthesize her medicine again.

Vanitas felt a surge of anger before he got up, gritting his teeth and growling down at her. " _You_ stop! I'm not him so stop reacting to me that way! You make me-!" What? She made him what? Intrigued? Disgusted? _Aroused?_ Any of them seemed like they could apply and yet he didn't know how to define the feeling that was coursing through him in that moment. "Just...go! Go find some of your stupid.... _whatever_ so you can stop doing that! I came here to fight you, not... watch you turn into a coughing mess!"

Aqua pushed herself up, one hand crushing some of the flowers. She forced herself back up to her feet, blood staining her lips as they curled up into a smirk. "You beg me to kill you, yet you can't wrap your head around the fact that I'm dying." She laughed, calling her keyblade back. "I know what you are. You're still a monster. You may have the face of a person, but that doesn't change that you don't have the heart of one! Otherwise, you would know real pain and not... not whatever you _think_ it is!"

"I've been dying since I was created, but it's not like that's anything I'm going to care about. I'm not meant to live very long anyway, which is a _relief_. As for the heart thing, I suppose you're almost right about that one. I don't have the heart of a person....I have _half_ of one."

Vanitas then walked up to her once more, staring up at her. "You seem to know everything about pain, _oh wise master!_ " He gave her an exaggerated bow. "How about you demonstrate for the class? Hm?"

"How can I demonstrate something you have no way of understanding?" She let her keyblade fade again, shoving past him. He said he had half a heart, which seemed impossible. But if it was true, and he only had half, then he only understood some forms of pain, not all. "You have no love for anyone in your heart, therefore, you could never understand the pain that people go through."

"Love would be a positive emotion." He went quiet for a while, deciding perhaps it was time to finish this encounter. Before he would leave, however, he knew what note he wanted to end it on.

"I had those cut out of me years ago."

Roots twisted inside of her, petals danced near her heart. She clutched at her wayfinder, pretending that she was holding Ven's hand, that he returned her feelings and kept her from dying.

"Then you're lucky. Not everyone can cut it out so easily." She struck at her armor then, the cool metal encasing her entirely. She had to get out of here, she still had to find Ven and bring him home.

"Who said it was _easy?_ " He hissed, taking in a deep breath, seeming pained for a reason she couldn’t quite put her finger on. Before she could pick out any clues as to why, he materialized his helmet once more, growling in frustration. "Go cure yourself. I can't stand looking at how _pathetic_ you are anymore."

And with that, he was gone.

She took a shuddering breath, the motion rustling the flowers inside. Did he really think she could cure herself so easily? No matter. She would just have to hope that the next time she fought him, she would have her medicine on hand.

After all, she could continue dealing with this, just like she had for the past four years.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the wait everyone, and thank you to our betas for looking this over! Chapter three is on the way!
> 
> Eventually. We have to figure out which part is chapter three xD

She didn’t care that he was a monster.

Vanitas hid in the shadows of the spaceship, watching silently as Aqua bent down and spoke softly to the abomination, a soft smile on her face. How could she be so nice to it? It was violent and obviously not human. She treated it like a child who just needed someone to try and show understanding. She didn’t treat it like the monster it was created to be.

He wanted to find the humor in it. After all, how hypocritical was she being? Instead, he found himself angry and perhaps a bit envious. Was it because this one looked like a cute little pet? Was it the makeshift wayfinder? What made the situation with this thing different from their own? She didn’t even know if this thing had been friendly to Ventus and Terra or not. She barely knew anything about it.Yet, while her eyes showed him contempt and anger, they showed that thing kindness and compassion.

He hated it. It made him feel sick.

Despite this, he couldn’t stop watching her. He couldn’t get himself to leave the ship and continue on his way. He kept his gaze upon her every chance he got, watching her run through the ship with determination and skill. She really deserved the title she’d gained with how masterful her fighting was. She could destroy every one of the Unversed he created without fail, practically dancing in a flurry of light and ice and fire.

He just wished that whenever she’d destroy them, she’d destroy the feelings they represented as well. Instead, they all would flow back into him and increase in intensity, leaving him desperate to stop her while simultaneously desperate to feel more.

He couldn’t decide whether she made him feel more dead or more alive, but she made him feel  _ MORE _ .

And that’s all that really mattered.

***

By some miracle, Disney Town sold the materials for her medicine. After helping Horace out with the Fruitball area, trying some ice cream from those ducklings, and defeating a few Unversed at Rumble Racing, Aqua had sat herself down on a bench in the town square, carefully synthesizing them and bottling them up. She had already drank half of one bottle, which would be enough to fight her symptoms for the next few days.

It was. . . A bit embarrassing though, having her hanahaki called out by Queen Minnie. But even the mouse's words of hope would do nothing to encourage her.

She had accepted her fate long ago, after all.

"You got your medicine, I see."

It was the only sound her latest enemy made, having been silent in his approach. Still, despite sneaking up on her, he didn't really sound all that....threatening.

She nearly dropped the materials, just barely keeping them from falling to the ground and becoming ruined. She paid good munny for these!

When did he get here? Why was he even here? Sure, his Unversed were roaming around, but that was normal by this point.

"What? Itching to pick a fight again? Because this time, I won't be held back by anything, Vanitas."

He groaned, shaking his head. "Oh, shut up. I'm not fighting you until your medicine has fully taken affect." He walked over to another bench, hesitantly sitting down a few feet down from her.

She watched him walk away, hesitantly uncorking her half full bottle so she could drink the rest. Might be best to hold back her symptoms for more than a few days if she was going to be running into him.

"Why are you here then, if not to fight me?"

"....Some of the Unversed wanted to play. So, I brought them." He watched her swallow down the rest of the medicine quietly, still staying behind his mask. "This is the perfect place for them to have some fun."

He could leave out just why those Unversed wanted to have fun in the first place.

". . . They really don't hold back in Fruitball," she found herself saying, setting the now empty bottle aside to wash later. She busied her hands with preparing the last few bottles of her medicine, wanting to be stocked up before she had to return home with Ven. "And the ones on the racetrack seemed to be laughing if they passed by me."

"Sounds like I brought them to the right place then." He watched her put up the bottles, trying to get a glimpse at what all materials were used in it. After all, he was curious just what would be here but not the other worlds.

She ended up with a few left over, which she tucked away in a pocket hidden by her sashes. Aqua rose to her feet, gathering up her medicine so she could put those away as well.

"Why are you still here? If you create these things, you can just pop them out and go, right? So why stay?"

He was quiet for a moment, not sure how best to answer. Perhaps, however, there was no harm in telling the truth. 

"I saw you were here... so I stuck around."

She narrowed her eyes, walking over to him. She itched to take out her keyblade, to show him what she could really do, but held back.

She wanted him to make the first move.

"Expecting a continuation from Radiant Garden then? Because I won't be coughing this time."

For a moment she remembered his hand on her chin, how he sounded when he called her (or at least the flowers) beautiful, and it took a fair bit of willpower to not let a slight flush cross her features.

"No. I'm not here for a repeat of Radiant Garden. I would rather fight you when we're both at our best. It's not enjoyable when you're at half strength." He stared up at her, trying to push down the thoughts of those lips covered in blood and petals.

Why had they been so enticing?

"While seeing you coughing your guts out is entertaining in its own rite, that's not what I want from our encounters."

"I hate that you were the one to see me like that. You, of all people, when it could have been anyone else." Even if it was Ven, which she knew was hopeless. How many yellow tulip petals had she expelled from her body the day she realized how hopeless it all was?

That had been three years ago. She had accepted her fate long before then though, when the roots had first settled in her lungs.

"Don't you dare breathe a word of this to anyone."

"Do I look like someone that any of your friends would believe?" He rolled his eyes. "And don't worry. No one is going to know besides me. I see no point in saying anything. It can be our dirty little secret if you like." He placed a finger to his lips in a shushing motion before leaning back in the bench, his arms resting on the back of it.

Aqua narrowed her eyes at him, feeling a bit of a temptation to smack his hand.

"There is nothing dirty about it!" she said, sputtering just a bit. "Its just. . . Look, it's none of your business!"

"He thinks of you like family and you know that. So, yes, I'll call it dirty if I like. Not that I'm going to judge. Who am I to judge what you're into in that area? I just want to become whole again so I can fulfill my purpose. I care very little what you like in the love department."

Her face burned with shame at his comment. It wasn't her fault that Ven thought of her that way, just like it wasn't her fault that he was never going to see her how she saw him.

"You seem so sure that you know the cause of my disease. You're the delusional one."

"You react exactly how I would expect you to if I were right so you can stop pretending now. I know it's Ventus. I know he doesn't like you the same way you like him. I also know you're in the later stages from the amount of blood and full flowers you had, so you've likely felt this way for a few years now... which is about as long as you've been living with him. You started coughing up around me, too, which seals the deal. Seems to me you're the delusional one if you think I can't connect the dots."

She didn't understand what he meant when he said that her coughing around him sealed the deal. Her method of fighting off her symptoms had merely lessened, that was all. Her medicine did a far better job, but she wasn't about to say that.

"I should have been in the later stages years ago," she found herself saying. "Two years ago, in fact. Most studies claim that victims of hanahaki tend to not survive more than a year without treatment." Or surgery, but she couldn't risk losing her feelings for Ven. . . Or even her memories for that matter.

She may have done research when she should have been training.

"So you've been self-medicating and it's been working out well, I assume?" He asked, leaning forward a bit as he rest his elbows on his knees. 

"As well as I could hope it would."

"So, you shouldn't even be here. You should be dead or in a hospital....Why keep it a secret with that kind of risk?"

She placed a hand on her chest, nearly digging her fingers into the fabric of her top. The closest she had come to being discovered was the Master seeing her turn some of the petals into a full garden in her room.

She had only done so to learn which beautiful blooms were killing her.

"I keep it a secret because I won't have any answers to their questions. Ven would want to fight whoever is doing this to me, probably rope in Terra if he didn't blame him automatically. And, Master Eraqus. . ." Master Eraqus would know if he found out about her disease. He would either force her to take the surgery, therefore revealing to her best friends who the cause was, or he would separate her from Ven.

She would prefer the flowers killing her to that.

"No. You keep it secret because you're afraid." He stood up, staring up at her a bit more curiously. "You're afraid of what they'd think of you and what they'd do. You're afraid of a life where you don't feel those things anymore. You're afraid of no longer having him near you." His eyes narrowed, looking a bit more judgmental this time.  "If you got them removed, you wouldn't care anymore. You know that, right? You'd stop feeling those feelings and you'd stop feeling all of this pain and you'd stay alive. For someone who seems to find it so odd that I wouldn't want my life, you seem pretty ready to throw yours away, too."

"You think I don't know that? You think I like hiding this, that I'm okay with dying?" She was trying to keep her voice at a relatively normal volume, not wanting to draw attention to them. "But it's more than just losing my love for Ven. It would mean I lose all feelings towards him. There are even documented cases of people having no memories of the person they loved!"

She couldn't look at him, squirming under his gaze and, somehow, feeling oh so small. "Yes, I'm afraid. Who wouldn't be afraid of this? But I've dealt with it and I can keep dealing with it. My situation is nothing like yours. You want to willingly die, to the point that you begged me to end your life. I don't want to die, but I'm letting this kill me slowly. Not because I want to, but because I don't want to lose my feelings. I don't want to lose. . . Part of myself."

He glanced away, as if her words hit a bit closer to home than expected. "....Losing part of yourself.... isn't a good feeling. Sometimes, though, that part can be holding you back. It could be keeping you from your full potential."

"Its not holding me back. Whatever might have held you back might not hold back others," she argued.

As he attempted to continue, the boy found himself cut off by a cough, something scratching at his throat. He rode it out, covering his mouth until it passed.

Aqua arched an eyebrow, moving to cross her arms. "Coming down with something?"

He shook his head. "No, I don't see how. I'm not entirely human, after all. It's probably nothing. Just ignore it." He stared back up at her, taking a deep breath in hopes his lungs might feel a bit more clear. "Look, I think death could hold anyone back. Just think of it that way."

She didn't respond, not even sure what she could say as a response. In the end, she just shrugged, turning to walk away from him.

"If we're done here, I have to attend an award ceremony."

"....Yeah.... go and win your reward." He replied, already sure who everyone had voted on. After all, he had seen everyone's reactions to the trio fixing his Unversed's disruptions.

"I didn't say I was winning. The Queen hasn't even announced who won yet." She couldn't believe it, but she actually smiled at him before finally walking away.

"She doesn't have to announce it," he muttered under his breath, "We all know it's gonna be you."

With that, he found another hiding place to slip into, allowing himself to simply feel the adrenaline and joy his Unversed felt as they continued to play.

***

Aqua knew she should have been surprised when Queen Minnie called her name. She was more surprised, however, to hear Ven and Terra's names. Only. . .

Of course they were nowhere in sight. Still, she was happy to accept the reward.

As she left though, she found herself looking for Vanitas, wondering where he had slinked off to this time. Would she run into him again? It seemed far too likely.

She'd find out soon enough, of course. Hopefully then she could show him her abilities at full strength. Then maybe, just maybe, he would back off.

The way she found him, however, was not the way she'd expected. 

Down an alleyway, Vanitas sat with a few of his Unversed, winding the gears of one, petting another... generally just taking care of them. 

It was almost like they were pets. 

He didn't notice her at first, too preoccupied with his tasks to pay her any mind. However, he would occasionally cough in a manner much like before.

She had been about to summon her armor and glider when she’d caught sight of him, the visual too hard to look away from. It was. . . Honestly too curious of a sight.

She had never seen the Unversed appear so docile before. Was it simply because they were around him, the boy who created them? Then again, they didn't react violently whenever she encountered them either. The ones she and the others had dubbed Scrappers would appear anxious, the Floods agitated.

Were they-?

Aqua's train of thought was cut off when she realized he was coughing like before. Despite his claim to not be entirely human, she could only assume he was coming down with something.

"Vanitas?"

Before she knew it, he was in front of her, keyblade to her throat and his every muscle ready to go further if he needed to. Still, he didn't actually attack, standing still before her, simply ready and poised for action.

"What do you want?"

She held up her hands, opting to not summon her own keyblade this time around. In a space like this there wouldn't be much room for her spells, and close combat wasn't her specialty.

"Bad time, I'm guessing?" She brought a hand to his keyblade, pushing it aside. "I would have thought you had left this world by now to go terrorize others."

"The Unversed can be in places I'm not, so they can do that while I take a breather. Is that a  _ problem _ , Aqua?" He snarled, but the ferocity was undermined by his own coughs, betraying his weakness once more. 

He refused to take his helmet off, though. He had a feeling he didn't want to see just what he was coughing up.

"No, it's not a problem. I also wasn't expecting you to have a gentle side, all things considered." If he kept his weapon trained on her, she might have to take out her own. His coughing made her second guess though.

While she could consider it was hanahaki, after all she'd seen of his actions, she felt it was impossible for him to feel love.

"You sure you aren't coming down with something?"

He dropped his weapon. Which, to be honest, would be a sign of peace if he hadn't  _ literally _ dropped his weapon. 

He was shaking, but he refused to let it go any further, suddenly running passed her and trying to get away from the other.

"Vanitas? Vanitas!" She could try and track him down, she knew that much. But he could drop into the ground at a moment's notice or open up a Dark Corridor and just leave. Her best bet would be running into him on another world.

Why was she even caring anyway? His face. It was his face. If she just hadn't seen his face, she wouldn't give a damn about him!

Aqua finally activated her armor and summoned her glider, quickly opening up a portal of her own to reenter the Lanes Between. Wherever she went next, Vanitas was sure to be there.

What she left behind, however, was a horrified and confused little creature sitting down in a corner of a factory, accompanied only by the loud noises of machinery and the hot, stagnant air. He was scared beyond belief as he stared down into his helmet with wide eyes.

Flower petals.

There were flower petals.


	3. Chapter 3

She kept telling herself that she was at the Coliseum to just find Terra, nothing more. The fact that she was clearing Unversed without so much as a thanks made it a bit harder to deal with. She was amazed that she had yet to actually wring Phil's neck though. She did not appreciate the way he looked at her and spoke to her though, as if she was some delicate little-!

"Hey, sweetcheeks, it's time for your next match. Careful though, the guy they're sending in seems to be brutal."

Aqua sighed, pushing herself from the wall so she could head outside. Whoever she was facing wouldn't get in her way of finding Terra here.

When she entered, she was met by a familiar person. However, it was pretty much the exact opposite of Terra. A mask that was becoming far too common of a sight met her eyes, staring from the other side of the ring. 

"Well, hello there. We meet again."

"You have  _ got _ to be kidding me!" She was expecting more Unversed, maybe Hercules or Zack, but him? Of all people, it had to be Vanitas! She was at least glad her medicine was still in effect. She couldn't give him the chance to knock her down. "Get out of my way." She summoned her keyblade, pointing it towards him. "Now!"

"Aww, but I'm your next competitor! I suppose if you want me out of your way, you're just going to have to go  _ through _ me!" He held up his keyblade, getting into his battle stance as he tried to ignore the tickling in his throat.

"Pretty sure that was the plan, actually." She chose that moment to rush him, her barrier surrounding her in a tight ring. If she could hit him with this, it would possibly put him off balance. Otherwise she had some other tricks to deploy. She placed a Mine Square down, hoping that if he popped up he would hit at least a few of those.

He quickly melted into the ground below, trying to pop up behind her and cast some spells of his own, attempting to keep at a distance.

Aqua cartwheeled away from his spells, though one or two still hit. She hated how his Fire spell could split like that.

He was about to float over her mines in hopes to avoid them... until the coughing started again. No! But it hadn't happened since he'd left Disney Town! Could it-?!

Before his thoughts could finish, he found himself falling on a mine, suddenly being thrown into the air and flying across the stadium a bit before falling on his back, feeling the breath being knocked out of him.

She hadn't even noticed his coughing, having ducked away from him the second it looked like he would dodge her mines to get to her. She looked at him in surprise when a mine went off though, having turned just in time to see him go flying.

What was going on?

Ignoring the fact that this  _ might _ be something she should consider checking into, Aqua instead cast several spells in succession, all aimed at him in the attempts to activate Spellweaver.

He felt his world starting to turn upside down, his body and mind betraying him as he attempted to focus and get up but was unable to due to the lack of air in his lungs. Instead, it felt like he was being stabbed by several needles in said lungs, making him tremble and shake rather than find a way to get up and attack. Out of desperation, he sunk into the ground to attempt to not be hit by the barrage.

If any attacks struck him, she didn't know. He was there one second and then gone the next, her spells striking the ground he had dove into. She stood up, looking around for that inky looking spot that would tell her where he was. As a precaution, she set up a few more mines, not wanting to be caught off guard. Once again, she found herself wondering about what was going on. It was like. . . Something was holding him back. Or at least making him falter.

He took a while to come up, just trying to catch his bearings and control the coughing as much as possible. People were watching, he needed to not be weak.  With a deep breath, he jumped back out, quickly setting up his shotlock in hopes he could get a decent amount of damage in as quickly as possible. 

Hopefully before the next coughing fit kicked in.

She didn't have a way to hide like he did when it came to his shotlock, and she didn't even know what his would be. She could prepare her own in retaliation, but there was no guarantee at that point on if they would hit him or not.

So she stood there, ignoring Phil shouting at her to hit him while he was open. She knew better than to rush someone preparing a shotlock. She was just going to have to time her barrier just right.

He growled, glaring at her and only adding his fury to his actions, not knowing how else to channel it in that moment. He let it charge and hone in, eventually yelling as he let it go.

"Don't just stand there, you idiot!"

"Move, sugarcakes, move!"

Their words blended together, the blue beam of Vanitas's shotlock shooting towards her. At the last second, she braced herself and threw up her barrier, the beam bending around it. She grit her teeth, taking careful steps towards Vanitas, sweat beading at her brow as she kept the barrier going. This was a clear strain on her, but she couldn't care right now.

Vanitas continued yelling, putting all the force he could in the attack. She was why all of this was happening! It only happened around her! If he killed her, then maybe-!

He screamed, putting every bit of power he could into the shotlock, trying his best to get passed her defenses.

She could see her barrier cracking, but she kept walking towards him. She had to shut one eye, sweat nearly dripping into it. Aqua screamed back at him, dropping her barrier seconds before it could shatter around her. She cartwheeled to the side, his shotlock grazing her arm as she prepared her own, screaming again as she unleashed a barrage of prism orbs towards him.

The crowd around them had gone dead quiet, watching the two of them. This was more than a battle of strength and skill now. It was a battle of will.

He had used so much of his power that he'd exhausted himself. He could only dodge and teleport around the place to try and avoid her blows. However, with how honed in her shots were, he couldn't escape them all, finding himself with a couple more wounds than before.

She was breathing heavily, her arm aching. Aqua fired as many shots as she could at him before she dropped to one knee, gasping. "Just. . . Just give it up, Vanitas!"

"NO!  _ You _ give up! I won't  _ ever _ give in to you!" With that, despite his wounds, he began charging toward her, holding up his keyblade in preparation for another blow.

Aqua just barely raised her keyblade in time to block his attack, her heels digging into the ground. "What are you. . . Talking about?!"

"I'm talking about how much I hate you and your stupid face!"  He began to try hitting her over and over, moving quickly enough to still be a threat, despite his exhaustion.

She couldn't block all of his attacks, unfortunately, one of his blows knocking her on her back. She sucked in a breath, trying to get herself back to her feet. "Then why call me a backup?!" Not that she knew why she was a backup, but still.

"Because we'd be  _ compatible! _ " He charged at her again, slashing and stabbing, hoping to get as many hits in as possible.

Was her face red at that comment? She could swear she heard murmurs from the crowd. Had he shouted it loud enough for them to hear then? God, she hoped this wasn't going to look like a lovers' quarrel.

Aqua managed to put up another barrier before his next stab could cut into her again. Her body ached and was forming bruises in various spots, her hair and clothes stuck to her with sweat.

And the roots in her lungs seemed to burn with each breath she took. How long had it been since she had her medicine? She had been in this world for a while. Did she even have the bottles on her right now?

"You  _ wish _ we were compatible, you freak!"

_ You freak. _

Why did his chest ache? Why did it hurt to hear those words? Why would her opinion even matter? He growled as he began to ghost around her more efficiently, many afterimages of himself filling the stage.

She shattered her own barrier, hoping a bit of magic that flew from it would smack him in the face. Aqua knew she couldn't keep this up for long though. The longer the fight went, the more exhausted she became. Her magic was feeling drained and just a bit abused, and she was trying so hard to not just use her own light to fuel herself for a bit longer. She began to cartwheel around the afterimages if any of them seemed to be for an attack, throwing up another barrier every so often.

When she could swear she found an opening, she thrust her keyblade towards him again, hoping to cut him off and knock him down. This match had to come to an end, after all. And to an end it came.

Vanitas was knocked out of the air, falling back as he was caught off guard. He landed on the ground, staring up at the sky as his exhaustion took over.

Aqua waited, unmoving, trying to see if he was feigning it and would get back up in seconds.

Then the crowd erupted into cheers again and Phil went over to name her the victor. But before the satyr could so much as jump up on a barrel to lift her hand above her head, she stumbled over to Vanitas.

Her knees protested as she knelt down beside him, staring at his mask before letting out a breathless laugh. "You really. . .  _ really _ pushed me. I hope you're. . . Happy." She slumped, crumpling up beside him as her own exhaustion made itself known. From her position, her hand just barely brushed against his.

He was silent for a moment before a chuckle escaped him.  "You pushed me too, you and your-" There. Coughs again. "...your stupid face. I'm not... not at my best... right now."

He pulled his hand away, as if afraid that a touch from her could make things worse. He instead forced himself back up to his feet, determined to get as far away as possible. After all, if he let it go on long enough, there'd be enough petals to compromise his vision.

She let out a sigh, staying on the ground for just a moment longer. Or, longer than that, since she heard Phil shouting for Zack and Hercules to grab her and bring her into the vestibule.

Maybe if she just rested a bit, then maybe. . .

***

Aqua didn't know when she awoke next, but she knew she was still in the Coliseum. Time must work differently here though, since that tightness in her chest had returned with a vengeance.

She forced herself to her feet, glad to find that she was (hopefully) alone. She just had to grab her next bottle of medicine and be done with this pain for another few days or so.

'Alone' no longer seemed to be a state Aqua was allowed to be in, however, as she was clued in to the presence of someone else in the room by one simple thing: 

Someone started coughing.

She lifted her head, deciding against pulling out her medicine for right now. In any other case, she would ask who was there and demand the hidden figure to come out of hiding.

Except she knew this cough.

"Vanitas?"

He groaned, having wanted to stay hidden but finding his body betraying him. He'd been hoping he could see what ingredients she used in her medicine so he could make some of his own secretly. 

That wasn't going to happen, it seemed. 

He stepped forward, hesitantly  coming out of the shadows of the far corner. "Yes. I'm here."

"Thought you would have slunk into the shadows to lick at your wounds," she said, looking over at him. "Or at the very least, not still be here."

She was going to have to leave soon herself. Final match or not, she was going to throw it. Terra clearly wasn't here, and she had just lost all traces of Ven. The thought of the blond sent a wave of pain through her, and she barely had any time to cover her mouth before coughing up a bloody sunflower, nearly choking on it. "I'm in no state to continue our fight."

"....Neither am I." His response was quiet, the boy seeming embarrassed to even say it. He was too embarrassed (and scared) by the prospect of seeming weak to usually ever admit to it.

If Xehanort found out…

"...I need some of your medicine."


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WE'RE ALIVE! And hopefully on a roll again with this fic to get it out before KH3, cause then we both just go total MIA for like. . . God knows how long xD But here it is! DEEP ROOTED DESIRE IS BACK!
> 
> Enjoy~

"What?!" Her hand nearly flew to where she had her medicine and the materials for it hidden, her eyes wide as she stared at him.

He. . . He needed her medicine? But that wasn't possible, he couldn't possibly be suffering like she was! Despite his face, this boy was a monster, one who probably couldn't feel love. She pitied the poor soul who had caught his eye if he truly did have hanahaki though. "I'm not going to give it up easily."

"Then tell me how to make it. I can't-!" He shook his head, taking a deep breath in hopes of calming himself down, only for the mere action leading to irritating his own internal growth. He was coughing again, though now it was more intense. His hand instinctively flew up to his face only to meet the glass of his helmet yet again. 

She smelled intoxicating and horrendous at the same time. The close proximity only made it worse. He couldn't breathe. He couldn't speak. He hated every bit of it.

He. . . He seemed really sick. And if he truly had hanahaki. . .

Aqua sighed, shuffling out the materials from Disney Town. It was only enough for a half dose, but she still went about mixing them together, adding in a few extra dashes of magic to try and up the potency, as well as improve the taste.

Hey, medicine was medicine, and she didn't want him to spit it out. After synthesizing it all and putting it in an empty bottle, she handed it to him. "Drink."

He stared at it for a long moment, swallowing the lump in his throat. It only just then occurred to him that he'd have to take off his helmet. He didn't want her to see his weakness. He hadn't even wanted to see it himself, refusing to take off the helmet ever since Disney Town. He almost ran away, not wanting to face the situation at all.

....But if Xehanort found out…

He hesitantly reached up and tugged off his helmet, avoiding her eyes as a variety of blood-stained petals fell from it and onto the floor. It didn't take much to notice that the helmet was absolutely filled with them. His lips were stained a reddish brown, various speckles of the same color scattered across his face. 

It had progressed far too fast. Faster than it would for a normal human. 

Feeling naked, he quickly grabbed the medicine, hoping he could get it down and put his helmet back on as quickly as possible.

She could only stare, her gaze lingering on his lips and face for perhaps a moment too long until the helmet was in place again. With no eyes to look into, her attention drifted to the petals that had fallen from his helmet. Some were red, others she just couldn't tell.

But all had blood. Why did they all have blood? Hers hadn't become bloody until maybe the month before the Mark of Mastery exam, and the blooms followed those soon after. So why was his. . . ?

"H-how. . . ?"

"Why would you think I know? I didn't think I could even get it." He felt another cough course through him, wanting nothing more than to run away from her. Still, he needed to figure things out."...How long before the medicine starts working?"

"It. . . It takes a few minutes, but that's how it is with me, especially with a half dose. It might take longer with you though. . ." She took a step towards him, almost wanting to take that stupid helmet off so she could take a good look at his face again. Instead, she bent down, standing back up with one of the petals in her hand.

"Chrysanthemum." Love and affection. She would expect him to have a flower with a more violent meaning, not. . . Not this.

"....I noticed I have different ones from you. Does that mean anything?" He needed to think of all of his questions while he was talking to her. Still, he knew who was the cause, and staying in her presence was only keeping him in this state. His coughing seemed to be getting worse before it got better, another fit overcoming him.

"From what I read, everyone can have a different set of flowers, based on their own feelings." Hers involved the various forms of her love for Ven, her desire and wishes, her loyalty. Some hadn't come until recently though, making it an ever changing thing. "Whatever you have now may stay or change later. It all depends on how your feelings develop. Unfortunately for you, I can only think of one cure for your case."

He blinked, looking up at her. A cure? He hadn't really expected a cure. He expected to die before that even became an option. "...There's a cure for me?"

"You can get the flowers removed. Depending on the world you go to, it's a surgery they can perform." A surgery she would refuse until her dying breath.

Maybe she was a masochist, enjoying the pain these flowers gave her. But they were her feelings for Ven, and she didn't want to lose that part of herself.

"The flowers would be removed, and any and all feelings you have to whoever you have fallen for will vanish along with it. There are. . . Some cases where the flowers and feelings come back, if seeds are left in the body. Sometimes the surgery even causes the memories to vanish, and you wouldn't remember who you once loved." Another reason she couldn't do it.

"....I need to remember her, for practical reasons." He silently cursed himself, realizing he'd just revealed the gender to her. That would narrow down anyone she suspected. "....And.... I'm going to guess it requires money... getting the surgery done."

Aqua found herself sighing again. She let the petal drop from her hand as she moved to walk away from him, reaching for another bottle of medicine. She still had to take her next dose, after all."Then unless you can get her to love you back, you're stuck with those flowers filling your lungs."

"....How do you make it? I need to know. I...I can't let him find out. I'm not supposed to... feel things like this. I'm not..." Panic filled his voice, a voice that no longer sounded cocky or mocking or even taunting....but a voice that sounded closer to a desperate, scared little boy. 

Who or what could scare a guy who wasn't scared of dying? She didn't like the sound of that. There was someone pulling the strings here, and she didn't know who. There was a part of her that just wanted to question him, figure out what was really going on.

Only then would she give him the material list. But that could just increase his fear, couldn't it? She let out a frustrated huff. "Come with me to Disney Town. That's the only place besides the Land of Departure with the materials so far."

He wanted to oppose, instinctively wanting to stay on his own... but that wouldn't actually help him in the end. He knew that. This was going to be tough. "....Okay. I'll go.....with you."

"I'll show you the ingredients and how to make it. After that, you won't get anything else from me." She motioned for him to follow her, heading out of the vestibule."And maybe drop the helmet while we're there?"

"....But I look like a massacre under here. I really don't see them liking that."

Why did he feel this ache in his chest? Why did he care at all whether she stuck by him or not? Why did her words sting?

_ You freak. _

He swallowed, forcing the emotions down as best he could. He didn't need any Unversed giving away how he felt. 

"We'll just have to clean you off before entering town then. If we miss any spots, I'll just say we were ambushed by Unversed."

She took the chance to activate her armor now that they were outside, hesitating a moment before turning to look at him.

". . . How do you get around, Vanitas? You don't seem to have a glider."

"I don't need one," he replied simply. "I can travel between worlds on my own."

There was a part of her that wanted to claim he was bluffing, that there was no way he could travel between them on his own. Except he had, so far, shown up in the same worlds she had and possibly more. "Well, if you didn't have one or a way around, I would have offered for you to hop on mine."

"....I still could. I... still don't really feel too good, after all." He knew he was making excuses. He knew he could go on his own. He knew he didn't need her help whatsoever to find the place and get there. But there was something about how it felt to be near her despite the growing sickness within him. Something that was warm and inviting.

"Alright. Might be best anyway. You could end up lost in the Lanes Between like this, too. And as much as I hate you for what you've been causing, I wouldn't want anyone to suffer from this."

She thrust her keyblade into the air, watching it shift into her glider. She jumped on, looking over her shoulder at him. "Come on then."

He hesitantly got on behind her, glancing down before wrapping his arms around her, unsure.

She nodded, turning her attention back forward. She moved the glider so they were facing upwards, the portal she had used still in place.

"Just hold on."

And with that, she sent them shooting off to the Lanes Between.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WE'RE BACK! Sorry that this one took so long for us to get to. With KH3 on its way out, we wanted to wait until the hype had died down and people had gotten a chance to play it so this update didn't get lost in the shuffle. And oh, don't worry, there are no spoilers here.
> 
> Anyway, we hope you guys have fun with this chapter, it ended up being a really long one. Sorry about that, haha, we just couldn't find a place to cut it without it being awkward.

Instead of heading to Disney Town, however, she brought them to Radiant Garden. She disengaged her armor upon landing, turning to look at him with a critical eye.

"You need new clothes."

He was taken aback by her statement, crossing his arms with a glare she couldn't really see. "Excuse me?"

"We can't just go into Disney Town with you looking like that." She gestured to his entire ensemble. "They'll view you as a threat, and I'd rather not sneak off somewhere after buying the medicine materials while we're there."

"In case it didn't click the first time, I don't have any money for clothes! And I can't waste any time! I have things I should've already done!" He threw up his hands with a groan.

She held out a bag, shaking it a bit. The contents clinked around inside of it, making it clear that it was a bag of munny.

"I never said you were paying. It won't be a waste of time if we make these trips quick, okay? And then you can go and terrorize whatever world you're supposed to." Even though she would undoubtedly stop him in the middle of it.

He sighed, knowing now that he had no good reason to oppose. He hesitated before nodding, caving to her insistence.

"Okay... but I need to clean off my face and helmet before we get anything."

"Thank you." She put the munny pouch away before clapping her hands together. "We're near Merlin's house, actually. You can wash up there, I just have to get him out. Then again. . ."

She thought for a moment.

"We could probably walk in and he wouldn't care."

"....He wouldn't care that a being of darkness just walked into his home? Isn't he a powerful wizard or something?"

Aqua shook her head, unable to keep herself from laughing. "I merely walked by and he thought I was there to see some sort of book that Terra and Ven looked at." Her laughter subsided into just a few giggles now. "He might be a bit senile."

"....I see. Okay, I guess we should get a move on." He held out his hand, a bit of a peace offering.

"Ladies first."

She smiled, taking his hand in hers before moving to lead him out of the alleyway. She was already noticing a few familiar buildings, so hopefully it wouldn't take long to get to the wizard's house.

"Come on, this way."

He was caught off guard by the feeling of her hand on his. He felt his heart trying to pump out of his chest the longer he was in contact with her. His skin prickled with heat, his breathing growing harder and harder to manage.

Oh god, please, death would be better than this.

It wasn't long until she was pulling him into Merlin's house, leading him over to the mirror and sink tucked away in a corner. Funny, was it even here last time?

"Alright, get your helmet off. We have to clean that blood off your face."

He was quiet before tugging off his helmet, more flower petals falling out and fluttering down to the floor. He ignored them as best as he could while he turned on the water and began to clean the inside. He groaned when they didn't come off immediately, the caked over blood keeping them more stuck on than he expected.

She couldn't help but look at the new petals, kneeling down to pick up a few of them.

Daffodils. Please love me. Orange lilies. Hatred and pride. Purple hyacinths. Forgive me.

Who. . . Who did he love to cause such flowers? Could it be. . . ? No, that was ridiculous. She was going to be carrying new scars because of him.

He continued to scrub at the inside of his helmet, soon frustrated enough to start growling at it. "Stupid, freaking...."

 _That_ caught her attention, and soon she was standing up again, looking at his progress before gently taking the helmet from him.

"Here, let me." She began to scrub at the inside, glancing around the sink before grabbing some soap. If anything, it would loosen up the petals.

Vanitas was about to protest before he realized she, well....might have more experience with cleaning. He never really had done anything more than bathe himself, having grown up in a wasteland that didn't exactly need cleaning due to being, well, a wasteland and nothing more.

"....Fine. It's all yours."

She gave him a slight smile before turning her attention back to the helmet. Oddly enough, going through these movements reminded her of the cleaning duties back home.

And how hard it was to clean her own sashes when her petals first came up bloody.

"There, it's coming along a bit better now."

"....How did you make it cooperate with you? I thought I was doing the right thing and you just....did it." He pouted a bit, feeling a bit stupid as he looked at what she was doing. "How did you do it differently?"

"Patience, soap and water, and. . . And practice getting blood and petals out of difficult places." Her movements had been the same as his, just not as harsh.

"Its okay though, you'll get the hang of it." She rinsed out the helmet, setting it aside. "Now then, your face."

He was about to go grab some water from the sink and rub it onto his face until he realized...she was still holding the washcloth.

He almost panicked, afraid of the proximity. He could feel the petals threatening to rise up in his throat, threatening to leave him in a coughing fit once more and give away just who it was that had caught his attention....except they never came. The medicine must have worked, considering just how close she was getting and yet he could still breathe properly.

While it did seem like she was getting close to wash his face for him, she instead handed him the washcloth. It didn't occur to her that maybe he wouldn't exactly know the best way to wash his face, but they were still in somewhat of a rush.

"Here."

He blinked, having already mentally prepared himself for the feeling of her touch once again. When it didn't come, it honestly caught him off guard. He stared down at the washcloth in his hand, briefly wondering why he actually felt disappointed. He shook his head before taking the washcloth to his face, beginning to wipe at wherever he felt blood.

She watched him, taking note of any places that he missed. She wanted to see how much he could get off though.

It didn't last long, however. Aqua found herself taking the washcloth from him, beginning to gently wipe at the spots he missed.

He was about to oppose, but he knew he didn't really want to. He stared up at her for a moment before hesitantly closing his eyes, just allowing himself to enjoy the feeling of her warm, soft touches without fear of a coughing fit.

She didn't notice how close their faces were by the time she finished cleaning him up, her fingers lightly brushing against his cheek.

"There. Now you don't look like a bloody mess."

The moment was gone far too soon.

He opened his eyes to stare into her own, wondering briefly if this was what it was supposed to feel like. Was love supposed to be warm and inviting? Or was it frustrating and painful? Was it positive or negative? He couldn't really be sure anymore.

She blinked, staying where she was for just a moment more before pulling away, going about cleaning off the washcloth. What was she doing? She was helping a boy that had been trying to kill her, had probably tried to kill Terra and Ven, too.

And he seemed so focused on Ven. And yet. . . The cause of his hanahaki wasn't a boy. It was a girl.

"Okay, there's a shopping area just around the corner from here. We should be able to find you some clothes then."

He walked over to grab his helmet, grabbing another towel to try and dry it off. It wasn't long before he was putting it back on, much preferring the privacy it would give him and wanting that privacy for as long as possible.

She nearly told him to take it back off, but kept her mouth shut. If he wanted to wear it, then fine, but she knew he was going to have to take it off by the time be was trying on clothes or just changing.

Without thinking, Aqua grabbed his hand again. She gave a quick 'hello/goodbye' combo to Merlin when he finally came home.

Once they were back outside, she began to lead them to the shopping area.

There it was again, that cursed feeling of her touch, warm and soft and far-too- delightful. He was very thankful for his helmet then, knowing that his face was flushed underneath. He hated how easy it was to lose control around her.

He only hoped the clothes chosen could somehow be used to hide in some form or fashion too.

***

Once they were in the shopping area, she hurried to pull him into one of the clothing stores. Now, she did have an outfit in mind for him, which she would be grabbing. She just also wanted to see what Vanitas would come up with himself.

"Okay, dressing rooms are over there. Meet me by them when you want to try your new outfits."

He didn't really know what to get, but he went with anything he thought looked cool. Which resulted in him walking up to meet her within a variety of types of clothes.. but with very little color. In fact, the majority was black with a splash of red.

"How's this?"

She had a few clothes with her as well when he came back. She stared at the sheer amount he had, mentally calculating her amount of munny before remembering that they wouldn't be getting him everything that he grabbed.

"Why don't you try them on? Then I can tell you what I think about it."

He nodded, about to start changing right there when he remembered that there were dressing rooms. He... probably should get inside one of those.

It wasn't long before he was making his way inside, hoping to get this fine and over with but... also finding himself a bit excited to try on different things.

He'd never worn anything different.

She had been about to stop him when he remembered on his own just where he was supposed to go. So, Aqua leaned back to wait for him to change, wondering what he would look like this time around.

Funny. Maybe then she could differentiate them. The boy in the mask was a monster who tried to kill her while Vanitas was a boy suffering from the hanahaki disease.

"You ready to show me yet?"

"Just... one moment. I kinda just.... I don't know how to put any of this on, just let me figure it out."

He was a bundle of confusion. He'd seen people wearing all of these but he'd never had to wear them himself. As he struggled with buttons and belts and snaps, he worked them on as best he could. When he felt like it was all on as best as he could manage, he finally stepped out.

The only problem was that, while each item looked nice on their own... they... didn't quite go together.

Aqua waited until he stepped out, taking one look at him before quickly shaking her head, and pushing him back into the changing room.

Only this time, she followed after him and closed the door behind her.

"Okay, let's. . . Try again."

He tensed up, eyes wide as she followed him in. Wait, they were alone, in a room that people got undressed in, and she just locked the door behind her....

He went stiff, panic running over him. Of course he'd fall for someone who didn't respect boundaries in this area. Why would he ever think any differently? It's what he deserved, wasn't it? It's the only kind of love he deserved.

She handed him the clothes she had picked out before waiting for him. "Try these on instead. If they don't work, we'll figure something else out, okay?"

Once she was certain he had taken the clothes and wasn't going to drop them, she turned back around, reaching for the door so she could step back outside.

"If you need help, I'm right out here, okay?"

He was trying to control his breathing, trying to at least appear calm, even if he was far from it. He had already prepared himself for the inevitable when....it didn't come.

She was leaving. Why was she leaving?

"Uh...yeah....yeah, okay."

"Just knock on the door or something."

She stepped back out and closed the door again, returning to where she was originally. It was hard to actually contain her laughter as she remembered the absolutely disaster his outfit had been, but she held it back.

It was like when Terra tried to wear the Master's clothes once, or when Ven. . .

Before she could even complete that thought, she coughed lightly, petals sticking to her lips. Wait. Had she not. . . Taken her medicine? She had gone to take it back at the Coliseum, but then she had helped Vanitas and. . . And she reached for another but never drank it.

Great. She had forgotten about her own medicine.

He was quiet, settling down as much as he could. He tried to shove the images away, keeping his memories at bay as best as he could.

He set the clothes down, tugging off the ones she wanted him to replace, soon working with the new clothes to get them on.

Soon, he knocked on the door, indicating he was done.

Aqua glanced over at the door, hesitating for just a moment, trying to make sure there were no stray petals.

She opened the door just a bit before opening it in full, nodding. She had made sure the outfit kept with his color scheme, since she had felt certain that he wouldn't really appreciate having something very colorful instead.

"What do you think?" She gestured towards the mirror in the dressing room. "Because I think you look good in it."

"You think I...look good?" He seemed genuinely caught off guard by the statement, looking into the mirror with a curious expression. It didn't look unappealing, after all, even if it really felt off looking at himself in it. He'd never really seen himself in other clothes and it just felt.... weird.

But she thought he looked good in it.

He couldn't help how warm that made him feel, his face beginning to grow a little red the more he thought about it.

She walked up to him, lightly placing her hands on his shoulders. "Mhm." The color to his face wasn't missed by her either, but she took it as him never getting a compliment before.

"I'm going to step out again. You need to change back into your other clothes so I can go buy this set for you, okay?" She pulled away then, walking out of the room. "You can come out when you've changed back and walk around for a bit if you want."

He nodded, watching her leave before reluctantly closing the door back and starting to take the garments off.

It wasn't long before he was handing the clothes to her, looking back up at her for signs of approval.

Aqua gave him a gentle smile, almost wanting to reach out and ruffle his hair. She held the clothes close though, keeping that sudden urge back. Where had it even come from, anyway?

"Right! I'm going to go buy these for you, so when I get back you can change into them again, okay? If you want to look at anything else, you can."

With that, she turned to head towards the registers.

Vanitas hadn't expected to find anything interesting while wandering around. However, he found himself in a section he hadn't expected to come across at all.

The bakery.

Everything smelled amazing. Everything looked so colorful. Everything was probably so tasty! He'd only ever had sweets when his prize pods snuck them to him while Xehanort was away. He'd never seen so many treats in one place before!

His mouth was watering as he looked into the bake case, eyes wide and stomach hungry.

Aqua ended up wandering around before she managed to find Vanitas again. She walked up to him, handing the bag of clothes over.

"Here, it's all paid for."

She looked at the baked items currently on display, noticing the different cakes, cookies, and more  all on display.

"Hungry?"

"....Ver- I mean...no. No, I'm good."

He swallowed down the cravings, standing up straight again. He didn't need to eat. It was only gluttony in his case and he wasn't supposed to enjoy it.

At least, that's what he was taught.

Nope, she wasn't going to let that slide so easily. Whoever he worked with clearly didn't take care of him, and she wasn't going to continue that.

"Pick out what you want. I have munny to spare."

"Wh-what I want?" He felt so confused now. Didn't she hate him? Didn't she consider him a monster? Why was she.... picking out clothes for him and... getting him clean and... buying snacks for him?

This wasn't something enemies did.

"I...I don't know, there's so many choices. How-?"

"Just pick whatever looks best."

What was she doing? He had tried to kill her numerous times, had nearly succeeded in the Coliseum and had made an obvious rift between her and her friends! Not only that, but he knew of her disease, could take advantage of it if he so desired.

Yet she was helping him. Was it because he had hanahaki as well? It seemed so ridiculous.

He swallowed, still seeming a bit unsure before turning back to look at the various pastries inside, his eyes going wide with amazement again.

So many sweet choices! How did anyone deal with this? How could anyone really choose out of so many wonderful things?

He looked back at her again before presenting a question. "What do you like?"

What. . . Would she like?

Aqua turned her attention to some of the different choices again, grinning when she saw something she hadn't seen in a while.

"The macarons. And. . . Maybe a slice or two of cake."

"What's macarons? I've never had those before." He searched the case before his eyes finally fell on the name. He raised an eyebrow, looking it over curiously. "Is it some kind of...cookie? Biscuit?"

"It's like a cookie." She beckoned for the employee behind the counter over, pointing out the macarons she wanted. "I think it'll be something you like."

She pointed out the cake slices as well before turning back to Vanitas.

"Anything look like something you want to try?"

He blinked, looking over everything again before he settled on just trying whatever looked the most colorful.

He pointed at a big cupcake topped with strawberries, raspberries, blueberries, and blackberries atop buttercream icing and whip cream.

"That...looks amazing! "

Aqua motioned to the cupcake, the employee taking it and boxing it for them. She took what was packed up for them, thanking the employee before turning around again.

"Come on, let's go and I'll pay for these. Then you can change your clothes and we can head out."

He stared at the cupcake as it was grabbed and boxed up, honestly feeling his entire body feel warm and his heart trying to pound out of his chest.

She was getting him treats. Not just that, but she was giving him a choice on what he could have.

It felt like he was dreaming.

"You and your boy have a good day now!" the employee called out to them. Aqua stiffened, quickly turning with a shake of her head.

"H-he's just a friend, but th-thank you!" This was not how she wanted any of this day to go, especially right now. She motioned for Vanitas to follow her, heading back to the registers so they could pay and get out of here.

Vanitas heard the exchange and avoided commenting. He wanted nothing more than to disappear.... until he remembered the giant cupcake in his hands.

Nevermind, he was okay with this.

Aqua was quick to pay for the bakery items, hurrying them both out of the store as soon as she could.

"I am. . . So sorry about that," she said. "I didn't think the employee would assume. . ."

"I don't mind," he replied, looking around a bit. "So, um... where do we go to get me changed and get to eat these?"

"Well, if you want, you can go back inside and go to either the bathroom or the changing rooms to change. We would have to remove the tags though. Otherwise, we could probably drop you off at Merlin's to change."

She looked around a bit.

"There is. . . A park nearby, I think, where we can sit and eat."

"I'll let you decide. Whatever takes less time." He replied, sounding like he honestly couldn't care less if he even got into the clothes, just so long as he got to have his cupcake.

She sighed, moving to open the bag of clothes so she could take off the tags before moving to lead him back inside.

"Go and change in a bathroom then meet me back out here. We'll go to the park so we can eat right after." And if he took long enough, she might buy them some more food so they had more than just some snacks.

He nodded, quickly rushing back inside so he could get done as soon as possible. He changed much quicker this time around, having gotten more used to how to get it on as compared to before. That and, of course, he had more of a motivation now. His sweet tooth fueled him on.

He eventually came back out to meet her, looking around for her eagerly.

She had decided to take the chance and grab some actual food for them, grimacing at her funds as she walked back outside with the new purchases. Now, she wouldn't say it to Vanitas, but if she was going to get them some more munny (especially for the medicine materials), then she was going to have to destroy some of his Unversed.

She caught sight of him looking around once she was back outside, hurrying over to him.

"Hey! Sorry, I hope you weren't waiting too long. I got us a bit more food for when we sit down to eat."

Vanitas perked up upon hearing her approach. The excitement was obvious in his eyes upon her mentioning even more food being involved than before. He'd never eaten so much food at once!

"I wasn't waiting too long"

She noticed the excitement in his eyes, finding her heart breaking just a little bit at the sight of it. How little has he eaten in the past? Enemy or not, this was too cruel. Well, at least he hadn't been waiting for too long.

"Come on then, the park is this way."

He nodded, following after her  eagerly once more. Part of him was screaming that he needed to stop this, needed to get back to what Xehanort had told him to do.

But the other part of him wanted this. Just this. This seemed like so much more fun than he'd had in the past.

***

The park, it turned out, was just another part of the garden in this world. Only there were places for them to go and sit down, and she could notice areas for younger kids to go off and play.

"Here we go." She sat down at one of the empty tables, setting up the food they had bought. "You can eat your cupcake first if you want, okay? But I also grabbed some sandwiches and crackers, too. Plus a few bottles of water."

He unboxed the cupcake with excitement in his eyes, not even bothering with utensils before doing exactly that. He grabbed it up with his bare hands, diving in and practically swallowing it down with not even an ounce of finesse. Despite the obvious lack of manners or attempt to stay clean, it was honestly a bit cute. With each bite, he just seemed to grow happier and happier.

Aqua kept her own treats boxed up for later, tugging off her gloves before grabbing one of the sandwiches she had bought. Like this, she could ignore that they had both tried to kill each other, that they were supposed to hate each other.

Even if they went back to their old routine after this, right now was a nice moment of peace.

He continued to happily munch on the cupcake, eventually also grabbing some of the crackers from the food she bought to add a bit of salt in his mouth. He soon looked back up at Aqua, his cheeks puffed out from how full his mouth was.

Aqua couldn't help but laugh at the sight, grinning just a bit. "You look a bit ridiculous right now," she said, taking another bite of her sandwich.

He chewed quickly, soon swallowing down his food so he could talk again. "Shh, I don't get to eat often. I'm allowed to look ridiculous."

"You. . . You don't get to eat often?" She couldn't hide the disgust in her eyes. Who made it so he didn't eat often? Did anyone ever have a care for this boy?

"Well, eat to your heart's content today. Oh!" She put down her sandwich so she could take out her medicine. "I nearly forgot to take this."

"I...technically don't need to eat, but I've always loved food. Especially sweets. My master... doesn't approve of that. I have to sneak them." He glanced down at the food in his hands, suddenly looking a bit more hesitant. "...We should...hurry up. He'll want me to get back to what I'm supposed to be doing."

"Take your time, Vanitas. You deserve to eat something filling, alright? Once you're done, we'll head to Disney Town for the materials."

Whoever his master was, she was going to punch his face in.

Vanitas nodded, returning back to his food, but eating a bit more hurriedly now.

"Hey, you can slow down! Here." She opened one of her boxes to hand him a macaron. "Try this."

He chewed up the current bit of cupcake before swallowing it down. He looked back and forth between the macaron and Aqua, taking a deep breath before taking the cookie from her and putting it in his mouth.

Biting down, he was met with a texture he didn't expect, raising his eyebrows before continuing to shove it into his mouth with a happy sigh.

"See? I knew you would like that," she said, grabbing another macaron for herself. "No one can deny that a macaron tastes amazing, okay?"

He swallowed it down before his eyes wandered back to her form. She was...so nice. She was not only incredibly impressive in battle, but she had good taste in food as well as....looked remarkable.

He felt his heart starting to speed up once more before he quickly averted his gaze, trying to not push his limits.

Aqua finished up her food, somehow missing the way Vanitas looked at her. Whatever she had left over that could be saved for later went into a hidden pouch. As she went about packing up her leftovers, she noticed the absolute mess on his face, moving to hand him a few napkins. She then pulled her gloves back on, quickly standing up. "Okay, you ready?"

He wiped off his hands and face, licking his lips clean before nodding, hesitantly putting his own leftovers up and handing it to her. "I...don't really have anywhere to store it."

"I can hold onto it for you then." She took the leftovers, tucking them away into another pouch. "Now then, let's get somewhere clear so I can get my glider."

He nodded, following after her hesitantly.

If Xehanort found out what was happening…

He didn't want to know. All he knew was he needed to hurry this up and get back to creating the X-blade.

When they reached a fairly empty area, Aqua activated her armor and summoned her glider, quickly getting on it. After a moment, she turned to look at Vanitas.

"You. . . You need something to protect you in the Lanes, don't you?"

"My... outfit was my protection." He replied, looking down at his clothes.

"Do you want to change back for a moment? Or perhaps at least wear your helmet?"

He nodded, beginning to tug off his clothes.

"W-wait, Vanitas! Vanitas, what are you doing, people could show up, you can't just-!" Her own helmet, thankfully, hid the flush from her cheeks, and she could only feel it darken as she realized (with much embarrassment) that the boy had his original outfit on underneath his other clothes.

"O-oh. Um. N-nevermind then, um."

He blinked up at her, confused for a moment before realization dawned on him. A chuckle escaped him, before he found himself erupting into giggles. Giggles!

She stared at him, eyes wide behind her helmet's visor. Was he. . . Giggling? It. . . It sounded honestly too pure of a sound, too innocent to belong to a monster.

Why was all of this happening to her? Why was she doubting each interaction now?

"Yes, alright, very funny." She found herself laughing a bit now too. "Come on then."

His giggles eventually subsided before he finished taking off the rest of his clothes and handed them to her. "I don't really have any places to store these."

"Uh. . . Right, I'll just. . ." She used a spell to shrink them, tucking them among her things before turning back around. She waited until he was on the glider with her (and that his helmet was on) before taking off.


End file.
